I may be an Englishman, meaning that drinking tea is a law over here, but I've been feeling so dead in the past few weeks that I'm considering switching to coffee!

Annnnd now that I've said that, I expect that it won't be long until Queen Elizabeth sends along a jail chariot to either sentence me to death at the Tower of London or maybe she'll have me exiled. Maybe I'll end up in France, and the next time you hear from me, my name will sound like this -

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